What is more important? Please circle.

I’ve said before that I’m drawn to teaching August scripture from the perspective of the The Jesus Storybook Bible, which so beautifully offers the Bible as a bigger story: one of God coming to rescue the world in the sacrifice of Jesus. I long for August to encounter scripture as the good story of God’s great love for us, as opposed to the way I learned to apply scripture in my childhood Sunday School classes: well-meant but unfortunate morality lessons. When we read the story of Jesus and the miracle of the loaves and fishes, the lesson was always summed up in what we were supposed to change about ourselves: give what you have to Jesus (do better!). That’s a wonderful idea until you realize that you’re constantly a failure at giving what you have. And if you haven’t been taught to see Jesus as the miracle worker who takes the little you have and makes it miraculous, you live your life never being enough for Jesus to use.

So, Sunday, when August came home from church with a little worksheet on the story of Jacob and Esau from Genesis 27, I was caught off guard to see the “assignment” the preschoolers been given after story time, to go through the pictures on the paper and circle the “most important.” Their options?

Row 1: boy playing with a toy airplane vs boy praying by his bed with his father

Row 2: Bible vs a bowl of cereal

Row 3: boy on a computer vs girl praying piously in church

Row 4: boy helping his friend in a wheelchair vs boy pushing another boy

Look, I’m all for morality. Jesus said we would be known as his followers by how we love. Of course I want August to learn that the boy who helps his friend in a wheelchair is making a better choice than the boy who pushes. And I completely understand that it’s difficult to teach scripture, with all of its layers and complexities, to children without making it a morality lesson, but I didn’t feel comfortable with what I saw on August’s story booklet. I didn’t feel comfortable at all. Is playing with your toy plane less important to God than praying before bed at night? Is reading the Bible a better choice than eating breakfast? Is super pious-face heaven gazer doing something more important than the boy on the computer?

That worksheet wanted to draw a line between spiritual and physical things, asking my boy to judge which are worthwhile and which are not. The answer is not only much more complicated than it appears, it’s also damaging. If it’s true that only the spiritual things are good, are worthwhile, then we have to look honestly at every thing we do. How can we justify time spent reading a novel, cooking a meal, going for a run? We believe that God didn’t just dream us up; he created us. And I have to believe that he delights in our entering into His creation, fully participating in it–whether that means building a model plane or eating cereal or working on the computer.

I’m a recovering “good Christian girl” who knew just how to put that pious face on when I prayed in church. Of course reading the Bible was more important than feeding my body! Of course prayer was a better choice than play! I took all those well-meaning “do better” childhood Sunday School stories and shaped them into a theology of trying, striving, and failing, time and again.

It wasn’t until adulthood when the burden of carrying around the pile of what I’d left undone was too much. I saw everything in my life that wasn’t spiritual as a weakness. I lived with great guilt for choosing to study writing instead of going to Kenya and running an orphanage as I’d always planned. It took depression and therapy to open me up to the possibility that I didn’t understand the gospel. I’d missed the entire thing. It has taken years to believe that God’s love for me is not dependent on how spiritually impressive my life looks.

And so, maybe you understand that I didn’t like the message that worksheet was sending my 3-year-old. I don’t believe God loves the act of prayer more than he loves the child playing with his toy plane. God loves creation. God loves for us to enjoy creation, not as a second best way to use our time, but because creation is good. God delights in seeing my son play with his airplane and his cars and his dinosaurs, not simply because those things bring August joy, but because God loves play. August is a delight to the heart of God when he runs through the backyard, Lightning McQueen in hand, vrooming. He is being who God has made him to be.

I believe God made our bodies and our minds and our hearts and he loves when they line up into the beautiful all-encompassing story of redemption. The gospel is the story of Jesus rescuing us from all that we fail to do, all that we fail to be. I will never pray enough; but I am rescued. I will never show enough compassion; but I am given compassion in spite of my failure. I will never understand the depth of need in this world; but Jesus has rescued me in the midst of my ignorance. The gospel is the story of our brokenness and a love that is making us who we really are, not who our failures say we are. Only the gospel allows me to recognize what is good in this world.

After August showed me his worksheet, I had a little worry moment. What would I say to him about what he circled? I prepared myself for a talk about God loving play and prayer, God loving when we eat all our cereal because food is a gift from God. But it turned out, I didn’t really need to have carried that concern. Usually, children understand at a much deeper level what matters in this life and what doesn’t.

Once I actually took the time to look at what his 3-year-old fingers had circled with the orange crayon in Sunday School class, I realized his answers were perfectly true. He didn’t choose between the less important and more important. (And thankfully, his dear teachers did not make him choose.) He had simply circled everything he knew was good, no matter which row it was on. So, the boy with the plane was circled beside the boy in prayer, the cereal was circled and the boy who helped his friend. There was only one picture crossed out. It was the boy who pushed. (Pious heaven gazer was left blank. Seriously, what’s her deal?)

Nope. No need for that talk. We learn what’s good by what we see lived out, don’t we? And little boys always know that toy planes matter to God.




Filed under the Praying Life

16 responses to “What is more important? Please circle.

  1. Sam

    Oh, Micha. I just love this so much.

  2. Amy

    Amen. I love his joy inclusive circles!

  3. As a mom, I have had so many moments like the one you described-when I am uncomfortable, or actually even totally disagree, with something the church has said/done/given on a worksheet…..and I immediately start thinking about how I am going to “buffer” it-to have it somehow reflect our thoughts, our beliefs….when, just as you describe, somehow, instinctively, our kids-they get it. God in them, whether they are 3 or 5 or 9-they somehow have this perspective on how God loves the whole of them and the whole of everything around them..not sure when we lose that!!

    Beautiful, Beautiful…..

  4. danielle b

    So so sweet how August responded to the work sheet.

  5. Awesome post, Micha. The gospel IS so much about our brokeness and how God loves us anyway and how much he wants to be in on every aspect of our lives. But so rarely is that the way it is presented or discussed, especially to children. I think the community of believers would do well to spend more time with children and relearn what it means to be in genuine relationship with God. Aren’t they the ones who are so fresh from Him anyway?

  6. Alva Lee Harley

    I LOVED this post. And may I humbly make a suggestion. Write the publisher about your concerns. Before I retired I worked for a Christian publishing company. I worked with adult materials, but I know that they take all ideas and suggestions seriously. Once my little guy was praying, thanking God for making TVs. My engineer husband felt the need to clarify, saying that God didn’t actually make the TV. He just made us with brains that could think up things like TV. Chad got his Sunday school craft which was a cardboard with pictures that showed Creation and what was made each day. On Sunday it said, Rest. In Chad’s view, that meant that on Sunday God made “the rest.” Including TVs. I talked to my friends at our company and they made subtle changes.

    Write. They really will listen.

  7. julie

    this was beautiful and so absolutely true.

  8. What a wise little boy. Of course God wants us to play and eat.

  9. SO right on, Micha. Perhaps you can find out a little more about the curriculum your church is using? There’s a fab one out there called, ‘Godly Play’ – check it out. It’s expensive initially, but so.worth.it over the long haul. Love your thoughts on this oh-so-important issue: we are WHOLE creatures – every single arena of our day-to-day living is holy ground.

  10. Way cool. Toy planes matter to God indeed. With an eye toward that type of thing you are loosing the chains before they are draped over him, liberating him to be what God wants.

  11. kaili

    augdog for the win, once again. thanks for sharing, micha!

  12. Yay! So, so cool. I’m sharing this one with a few moms I know. šŸ™‚

  13. Rebecca

    I’m glad you studied writing, the kids in Kenya probably disagree, but I can be selfish and glad you share your thoughts in writing.

  14. Ok, this is just wonderful. Thank you for practicing a “Just say NO! to dualism in all its forms. Yes, God delights in boys with planes and boys in prayer. Irenaeus taught us that “the glory of God is a man fully alive …” This post is a such a beautiful picture of that truth in our day. You have a gift!

  15. So, so good, Micha. I said “yes. Yes!” out loud to my computer several times while reading this post. The gospel is about love, not piety. I’ve struggled with how much to project my evangelical upbringing vs. my desire for authenticity onto my children, so I was conflicted in sending them to a Wednesday night church activity where the gospel of evangelical salvation was preached. But eventually, I decided it did matter, and I pulled them out. For now. (We could also have had ongoing conversations about what they’re presenting vs. what Love says about it, but for now it’s the right decision for us.) My daughter went back with a friend this week, and brought home a coloring page that said, in bubbly letters, “I should be thankful in all things.” Why did they have to put “should” on there? Because it’s how they operate. I frowned. I told her I didn’t like that word, and there’s a better way to be thankful, flowing out of a heart of love that sees gifts everywhere.

    Thank you for your words and for understanding, like I’ve come to see, that those messages can damage our hearts toward God, even at a young age.

  16. Pingback: Worth reading

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s